My sister's kids

A couple of weeks ago I was in Seattle visiting my parents and sis. It was my most relaxed time in Seattle, ever, which was really good. And it was fantastic to spend loads of time just hanging out with Maia and Sophia and Stella.

I feel differently about my sister's kids than I've ever felt about anyone else's kids. I've never been a "kid" person. I feel no need to apologize for that, really, although I am coming perilously close at the moment as I try to put into words how I feel about that situation. I was a good babysitter as a teen only because I was a kid myself and could relate. Babies were another thing entirely; I hadn't been around 'em much, didn't know how they worked. They made me nervous; they did things that I didn't know how to deal with. As an adult, I never felt a burning need for a child - and I know that other people do have a real, intense need, but that was never my deal. I think in some way I was never ready or mature enough to be a parent. Maybe I am now, but I have always believed not having children is a perfectly acceptible option and I still believe that.

Given all that, I think it's way cool for other people to have kids. In the last couple of years a bunch of people close to me have had 'em, so I've had way more baby exposure. I went on a climbing trip with Shawn and Nancy and their daughter Maya when she was less than 2(?) and did my part in entertaining her. I've played with Mike and Sarah's son, Max, and watched him run madly down the sidewalk. And now I've spent hours playing with Sophia, drawing and building and reading books. And y'know, she's really something. For whatever reason, I feel a bond with her that is different than my bond with my friends' kids.

I look forward to more quality aunt time in the future. It'll be way cool.